By John Ployer
As the UPEI Senate approved a fall reading week for students starting next year, the entire campus was equally surprised to see hundreds of angels descend from the sky singing in unison.
The angels, floating down from a heavenly cloud, sang praises to the UPEI Senate, ending with the chanting of the word “finally” for about 3 hours before disappearing.
“I guess it’s so miraculous that UPEI would finally give us a reading week that they decided to celebrate with us,” said one student.
A fall reading week for the 2020-2021 school year was approved at the Senate meeting Friday. UPEI is one of the few universities in the region not to give their students a break in October.
The angels’ appearance coincided with multiple other miracles on campus such as professors speaking in tongues and students being cured of their freshman-fifteen.
Some students appeared less than enthusiastic about the Senate’s decision.
“Clearly, the end is near,” said one student as she frantically flipped through the Book of Revelations.
“See! First there is an earthquake, which there was a few years ago. Then there’s a fall reading week… or maybe it’s a war, the wording is a bit vague,” she added.
While some seem unwilling to believe that such a great decision is not a sign of the end of times, the Cadre’s emails to Senate members confirmed that a reading week will happen October 12-16 next year assuming the rapture does not destroy this sinful world.
The Cadre’s repeated emails and phone calls to heaven have not been responded to.